Tuesday, November 3, 2009

A Bondservant of Jesus

A Bondservant of Jesus
I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me . . . —Galatians 2:20

These words mean the breaking and collapse of my independence brought about by my own hands, and the surrendering of my life to the supremacy of the Lord Jesus. No one can do this for me, I must do it myself. God may bring me up to this point three hundred and sixty-five times a year, but He cannot push me through it. It means breaking the hard outer layer of my individual independence from God, and the liberating of myself and my nature into oneness with Him; not following my own ideas, but choosing absolute loyalty to Jesus. Once I am at that point, there is no possibility of misunderstanding. Very few of us know anything about loyalty to Christ or understand what He meant when He said, ". . . for My sake" ( Matthew 5:11 ). That is what makes a strong saint.

Has that breaking of my independence come? All the rest is religious fraud. The one point to decide is— will I give up? Will I surrender to Jesus Christ, placing no conditions whatsoever as to how the brokenness will come? I must be broken from my own understanding of myself. When I reach that point, immediately the reality of the supernatural identification with Jesus Christ takes place. And the witness of the Spirit of God is unmistakable— "I have been crucified with Christ . . . ."

The passion of Christianity comes from deliberately signing away my own rights and becoming a bondservant of Jesus Christ. Until I do that, I will not begin to be a saint.

One student a year who hears God’s call would be sufficient for God to have called the Bible Training College into existence. This college has no value as an organization, not even academically. Its sole value for existence is for God to help Himself to lives. Will we allow Him to help Himself to us, or are we more concerned with our own ideas of what we are going to be?
powerful stuff! Oswald Chambers really is so insightful.
I still remember at OIL'09, beginning of this yr, Dr. Murray challenged us to sign away our rights and becoming bondservants of Jesus Christ.
He had a card that read:
Anytime, Anywhere, Lord lead me! ______________
and those that felt compelled could go up and take that card and sign it.

At that OIL, I was so spiritually dry and bitter that though I was excited when I signed up I didn't even really want to go when the time came. (Praise the Lord that He had me sign up and went though!!!)
Usually when I'm at OIL, I call out to God and pray and cry. But this year was different, pretty much the entire time I was there, it seemed like there was an invisible barrier that I could not break through.  I tried to pray, barrier was there. I didn't know what it was and I couldn't get rid of it.

On the last sermon before we're leaving, Dr. Murray challenged us to give our all to Jesus, the one worthy of it all.
When he asked us to do that, I realized that it was because in my heart there were parts of me that I didn't want Him to have. I didn't want to give up everything to follow Him, it's scary. That was the barrier in my heart and He was calling me to give it up and I knew it. I broke down and tears came flooding out. I repented and asked Him for forgiveness. Then following the line of people, I went up and took the card.

Since then my life has been changed forever. This year has been the most amazing spiritual growth I've ever ever had in my life. Of course after OIL I still had A TON of disobedience that He had to help me with. But from OIL He led me to Harvest and wow I was so so so blessed at Harvest. The Spirit of God was calling me to change and give up my own ways to follow Him.
He loves me SO much that though I lived in rebellion and my heart didn't want to follow Him, He called me to Him. Now I also can love Him and live to glorify Him, it's a miracle.
THANK YOU FATHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love You Lord:) I am so blessed to know and have You with me always!! Help me to love and know You more so I can live for You and You alone. Jesus is the most wonderful gift we can ever receive. Nothing can ever separate us from His love. Thank You Father.

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